On My Grievances For Worship Music...

I recently have been experiencing a dilemma from my musical endeavors, as well as my perceptions on music-worship in particular. I constantly find myself (frankly) annoyed at Christian music for its monotony, lack of creativity, and most of all how I feel about what the role of that music is supposed to be. When I say monotony, I mean to communicate just what you all have, that it all sounds the same.

I oftentimes find my opinion aligning with that of Neil, that is, it must be insulting to an Almighty Being for such uncreative music to have been offered by a being of such greater potential. I think that we are better than G, D, C, (refrain) compositions, or are we? Some people just aren’t creative. Maybe those people are creating the best that they can. I don’t know, do you? There is a great struggle inside of me that begs the question of whether or not I am in the right place. Perhaps my understanding of the function of worship music is not where it needs to be.

Scripture tells us that the LORD delights in our song, but certainly HE expects the act of worship to be the most powerful, expressive, and humble act of our being. Maybe that is presumptuous. It probably is. Is the way that I judge music (especially worship music) even appropriate? With secular music, I feel as though I have the right and privilege of providing a social, creative, and personal critique upon it. On the other hand, is worship music even to be graded by the same standards? Pastors seem to tell me that it is the message that is important, that our singing is to be as a prayer to the LORD. I believe that is true; however, with me personally whenever I hear worship music I feel a strange, violating, almost haunting sense of distraction from the message of worship and find myself analyzing the music and placing scrutiny upon it. Who am I to do such a thing? I am belittling a faithful person’s worship to the LORD as being inferior, insufficient, even insulting when I fail to ask if what they are doing has a scriptural basis; or more than that IF WHAT I AM DOING EVEN HAS A SCRIPTURAL BASIS.

I have this feeling of not being able to fully communicate how I feel about the subject. Recently in church, I confronted my pastor about this issue that I’m having because it really has, does, and probably will continue to bother me until I resolve this problem within myself. I remember the passage that tells us that when we pray we are to, “let our words be few.” I wonder whether or not the simplicity of the music is necessary for the sake of worship. For me, it might be-I’m not certain yet. Maybe it is necessary for the masses as they would not have the ability to sing along to a song written in a 7/4 verse ending with a perfect cadence transitioning into a 13/8 chorus all the while making way to a free-time bridge. It’s simply not possible. I think that it is popular to have a 4/4 song in a simple major key because it is necessary for the large majority of the culture. They can interact with it much easier than a song that is more complicated like some songs written by my past band, Mayday!

This conflict eats me alive during every Sunday service or every time I turn on the radio hoping to find a good sermon on WFCJ (93.7 FM) and come to find a three hour period of worship music. I want to criticize the music for its lack of progressivism creatively but I am nearing the conclusion that I don’t have a place in doing that. However; that is not to say that I don’t think that individuals gifted with creative ability and aspirations shouldn’t pursue those abilities. I believe that individuals such as my close friends Neil, Kevin, T.j., and myself need to provide that option for people with a greater yearning for creative outlets out of commandment (“…do all that you do to the glory of God.”). The variety needs to be, and should be there.

Like Neil has outlined in his blog, he as well as all of us need to be reminded of just who all of this belongs to, HIM. None of this belongs to us; we are merely stewards of our abilities and our possessions for HIM as well as for others. What is ours now will pass on to another when we die, no matter how much less “worthy” they may be having not worked for the fortune that they inherit. We need to be willing and active in lifting up everything that we have and do to God. Like Neil, I find myself periled by the fact that I am so reluctant to give up that piece of “my” creative ability. In instances such as this, people have historically given such things up if they interfere with their ability to do all that they do to HIS glory. That is, if something causes them to stumble, to remove it from themselves. Sometimes I wish that I could do that, but other (and most) times I find myself praying for and trying to simply “gain the strength” to cope with this inadequacy. I think, “Why can’t I just suck it up and get strong enough so that this won’t be a problem?” –as if giving up is the easy way out. MAYBE SOMETIMES IT’S THE NECESSARY AND SAFE WAY OUT. Maybe it works for some and others are not called to do that, I don’t know. I can’t even talk about it, nor do I even really know what I am talking about.

Too many times; however, I find that those who are in positions of influence (musically) abuse that privilege and become the beast that they so thought that they fought to overcome. That is, that a lot of times even Christian musicians use their musical talent and status publicly to get attention, recognition –things of the world for that matter. Many musicians, including myself, like to look cool on stage having everybody’s eyes fixated upon them. I like it because it feels good, recognition. It is sinful; it is wrong. I sometimes wonder if maybe that was why Neil was reluctant to play out with Mayday! He had played out so many times that it didn’t mean anything any longer. Like Solomon in a sense, he recognized the vanity of it all, I suppose. This brings me to my greatest peeve in Christian music today, the Christian metal scene.

I am staunchly convinced that there is absolutely nothing glorifying to God about this music. Every inch of it is produced from the ego seeking recognition and even expressing and oftentimes advocating sin. My church has hosted many of these concerts because (and it so greatly grieves me that I could never describe it) it is what the youth these days want. They want to live in a culture of indulgence being permissive and tolerant of all things. Many of the groups that we hosted were encouraging violent mosh pits in the very sanctuary. Granted, I don’t feel any particular sense of holiness about a building mind you; however, in an environment and in particular an event geared at an outreach to the youth to share the Gospel of Jesus Christ is to me repulsive. Perhaps I’m wrong for thinking that; I probably am. It accomplished exactly what an outreach is geared towards, getting non-believers into an environment in which the Gospel can be presented. The musicians most of the time are exalting themselves, not God; however, it says in scripture that God works in all things for the good of those that believe in HIM. Maybe those selfish musicians do serve a purpose. I just feel really uncomfortable about it for whatever reason. This is how I feel even if it is not logically sound.

I suppose it bothers me not because the motives of these bands are selfish and for vain things, but rather for the reason that they profess that they are Christian bands which in my opinion tarnish the name of Christianity. Those who encounter Christianity may remember this band and think of them, only adding to layers of preconceived inconsistencies within the Christian faith and lifestyle. That’s probably not entirely true, but nonetheless, it is now a face that Christianity has and will have to answer to. Like I said earlier, God works in all things for the greatest good of those who believe in HIM; however, does that put me in the wrong for feeling offended because of the now shared title that I have with these hypocrites? I don’t know. I’m a man without answers.

I think that they way things are may be for the best (as much as I may not agree with them). The simple, horribly uncreative, monotonous music created by the Christian pop music culture is “working” for the masses. For those that have a greater yearning or need for creativity, the options are out there. For all of the hypocrites within the Christian music scene, God will use them anyways. What they do cannot tarnish whatever plan that God has. What is necessary though, is the focus. Just as when Peter encountered Jesus walking on the lake he only plunged into the waters after his eyes became unfixed from Jesus. No matter what we do or how we feel, we need to place our trust in him; take our burdens and leave them at the cross, lift up everything that we have to HIM, and never lose sight of HIM.

I like so many others really do need to forget myself and pick up my cross and follow HIM, though I often fail. Thank God that I have grace, though I don’t deserve it. In fact, I so undeserve it that I cannot even conceive of why HE would ever give it to me in the first place. I’m all the more grieved by my sins for the suffering endured on the cross in my stead. I feel grieved by my musical conviction, for it is a sin in that I stumble because of it. I judge the musical prayers of others by placing value upon it and the type of music I would like to make in HIS name, I fear, would not be totally to HIS glory. Like I said, we must never lose sight of Christ, what HE has done for us, and what HE is doing for us every minute of every day –allowing the Spirit to convict us of sin and to forgive us through grace, justifying us through faith.

I leave this post without an answer or an opinion about it other than it troubles me, it grieves me, and most of all it reminds me of just how unworthy I am of HIS forgiveness. Praise be to God.

In Christ,
Στεφανος Άρρις